As a therapist who teaches therapists, I have been hearing so many stories lately about children getting into fights at school, and as we continue the story, we hear about the awful fighting between parents who are getting divorce. In questioning the parents they admit that they are arguing and getting loud, name calling, and even getting physical at home.
It is no wonder the gang mentally of bullying one another gets transferred to the classroom, where the frustrated student uses the same tools they learned at home. When confronted by another student they resort to yelling, screaming, pushing or shoving. In counseling, families learn a different way to cope with frustration and teach their children by their new behaviors how to stop and breathe and look at things a little differently. When parents decide they are going to back off from arguing and fighting, when they truly decide not to fight, the family starts healing. Less fights on the playground come from a decision of parents to choose peace over fighting.